todays feeling: ugly as hell..why? i cant take it anymore karma where are you?

i dont know why i'm writing in english? maybe because i just sat and searched info about the ib program i'm going to in high school (gymnasium) and also because i feel nervous as hell about my new school. talk english, every lesson? what if i dont fit in? if my engilsh sucks? i have the highest grade in english, but i dont trust my school, a bunch of shitty teachers is all there is..and don't remind of all the students BLUE-NECKS! haha sorry..i just felt like writing a little shit to make me feel better. well i don't know if i feel a lot better sitting here and writing up swedish words on tyda.se.......OH MY GOD and i'm supposed to have the highest grades, well that's just PERFECT!